Monday, December 5, 2011

You have all the skills you need to teach your child

So, I was enjoying my coffee and reading an online conversation when this question was asked of a young mom I know who is raising her first baby, still a toddler, and considering homeschooling.

"Do you really think that you can provide for all of your child's educational needs?"

There was an internal instinct to jump right in to this conversation and defend her and my own ability to homeschool our children. I didn't though, because I knew my words would be emotionally loaded. But, the more I have thought about this question, the more I feel it deserves an answer. Not for the person asking, he already has his opinion, but answered for this young mom, and for all homeschooling moms.

The answer is YES! I can provide for all of my child's educational needs. And, you can provide for yours. I promise you can.

My initial response is that I can because I'm the only one who really knows them, and then I looked around at the children in my house and my mind reeled as I thought of all their different personality quirks and the vastly different passions in life. There is no one else in their life who could know them as well as I do.

A school teacher meets my child and knows them for nine months. The first nine months of my relationship with my child was spent with him in my womb. Our relationship is far more intimate than theirs can ever be. After nine months, their relationship ends; ours has only just begun.

As my child grows, I see what makes his eyes shine, what makes him smile and what makes him sad. By the time he is of the age where he would go to school, I already know the nuances of every facial expression; like when he really likes something and when he is just being polite. I already know the things that make him laugh and cry, what he will spend hours devoted to and what bores him silly.

I don't need a college class to tell me how to recognize a child's learning style, I've been watching it develop for years.

God gave me the privilege and responsibility of training them. God has given me all of the skills that I need to teach my child. He has also given me a keen ability to see my own shortfalls and weaknesses. That's why I buy curriculum, hire tutors and pay for classes in the areas that I need help.

Homeschooling moms are inherently insecure. We know every moment that our children's future is dependent on our ability to recognize and meet their needs. We aren't just parents who can blame the schools and we aren't just teachers who can send kids home at the end of the day and blame the parents.

We are it! We are the only ones to blame. And, we do hold ourselves accountable. Every time our child misspells a word, or struggles with fractions and percentages, we wonder what we did wrong. We ask ourselves if we are capable, if we are competent. Every time our child speeds past our own knowledge in an area and dives into a subject we know nothing about. We wonder how we'll find the right resources and if we'll ever keep up.

It is reasonable and beneficial to use experts. In just the past few months, we have sought out horse trainers, dairy farmers, art teachers, librarians, vocal instructors, theater majors, tree farmers, sharpshooters and wood carvers to help us meet the educational needs of our children. I would not expect one eighth grade teacher to be an expert in all of these areas, and I don't expect that I will ever be either.

If all does not go perfectly, we blame ourselves. We second guess ourselves and we wonder if we can or should do this. We don't need others to ask the question that we are already struggling to answer every day. The honest answer is No, I can not provide for all of my children's educational needs alone, but YES! I can with the help of God and all the smart, talented people we know. You can too.

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