So, I have to choose a family to analyze.
Well, my regular readers already know who I will choose.
I'm too busy with my own life to pay attention to the intimate details going on in someone else's home, SO without further ado: I choose ME!
Mom + Dad = half a dozen blessings.
Married for 17 years, two teenage girls, two preteen boys, and two toddlers.
Dad is a Vicar, Mom is a writer.
Mom hangs out all day in her favorite chair, bossing the kids around, making them LEARN stuff.
Dad works ALL the time, but mostly he's just down the hall so we can go bug him whenever we want.
That's US!
My family definition was "...small, kinship structured group whose primary function is the nurturing socialization of newborn children." (p.4) For a more elaborate discussion, see my post on Defining Family
Monday, January 16, 2012
Potty... what?
I'm not an unschooler, not really. The rigors of academics were ingrained in my psyche and I push my kids when it comes to completing the basics successfully. But, there are some things that I just leave alone. Maybe it's because I'm lazy...
Here's an example of unschooling theory in practice. My five year old lasts about 15 minutes in a sit down and learn situation. But, he'll spend an hour making a map with detailed instructions so that he can direct me (or a sibling) to the secret location of the treasure.
When he says, "Mommy, write 'go this way' for me."
I don't.
Maybe it's because I'm lazy...
Instead, I hand him a chart with all the letters on it and I tell him to write it himself. He writes from right to left, which is kinda cute and I think maybe he'll be a Hebrew scholar someday. His letters don't always look quite like the ones on the chart, but I don't care. He'll erase them and do it again until he says "This looks great!" and then he tapes it to the wall for the other 'spies' to find.
He's learning to read, write and spell, but I'm not teaching him... I'm just letting him.
That's unschooling in practice.
Sometimes, I'm more of a Tiger Mother. I force my children to join stuff, and practice their skills, drill their math facts and I expect them to get high marks on their academics. We have quizzes and tests and I can be a nag.
But, there are some things that I just leave alone. Maybe, it's because I'm lazy...
Like, potty training.
I've never potty trained any of my children. Five out of six can use the potty consistently without messing their pants or wetting the bed. The sixth just turned three and I'm sure he'll catch on eventually.
Yes, you read that correctly.
He just turned 3.
He's still in diapers.
And, I don't care.
Maybe, it's because I'm lazy...
We own a potty chair.
It's even in the bathroom
well, actually right now it's in the living room. It doubles as a stool.
He sits on it sometimes.
He reads (well, looks at) magazines there.
He has even sat on it naked and had pee and poop land in it.
Mostly to his surprise though, not with any intent.
When I let him run naked, he just goes on the floor. I'm lazy - I don't want to follow him around cleaning that up.
Usually, there comes a point where I instinctively begin to think that the butt I'm cleaning is too big for me to be wiping. Then, I start making them clean up their own messes; throw away their own diapers, wipe themselves off, even head for the tub and wash up when necessary.
I don't want to clean up diapers forever.
I tried to potty train a kid once. She's 16 now, but I still remember what a nightmare that was.
Never again.
They all figure out the potty thing, and our little three year old is figuring it out too.
But, I'm not teaching him.
Here's an example of unschooling theory in practice. My five year old lasts about 15 minutes in a sit down and learn situation. But, he'll spend an hour making a map with detailed instructions so that he can direct me (or a sibling) to the secret location of the treasure.
When he says, "Mommy, write 'go this way' for me."
I don't.
Maybe it's because I'm lazy...
Instead, I hand him a chart with all the letters on it and I tell him to write it himself. He writes from right to left, which is kinda cute and I think maybe he'll be a Hebrew scholar someday. His letters don't always look quite like the ones on the chart, but I don't care. He'll erase them and do it again until he says "This looks great!" and then he tapes it to the wall for the other 'spies' to find.
He's learning to read, write and spell, but I'm not teaching him... I'm just letting him.
That's unschooling in practice.
Sometimes, I'm more of a Tiger Mother. I force my children to join stuff, and practice their skills, drill their math facts and I expect them to get high marks on their academics. We have quizzes and tests and I can be a nag.
But, there are some things that I just leave alone. Maybe, it's because I'm lazy...
Like, potty training.
I've never potty trained any of my children. Five out of six can use the potty consistently without messing their pants or wetting the bed. The sixth just turned three and I'm sure he'll catch on eventually.
Yes, you read that correctly.
He just turned 3.
He's still in diapers.
And, I don't care.
Maybe, it's because I'm lazy...
We own a potty chair.
It's even in the bathroom
well, actually right now it's in the living room. It doubles as a stool.
He sits on it sometimes.
He reads (well, looks at) magazines there.
He has even sat on it naked and had pee and poop land in it.
Mostly to his surprise though, not with any intent.
When I let him run naked, he just goes on the floor. I'm lazy - I don't want to follow him around cleaning that up.
Usually, there comes a point where I instinctively begin to think that the butt I'm cleaning is too big for me to be wiping. Then, I start making them clean up their own messes; throw away their own diapers, wipe themselves off, even head for the tub and wash up when necessary.
I don't want to clean up diapers forever.
I tried to potty train a kid once. She's 16 now, but I still remember what a nightmare that was.
Never again.
They all figure out the potty thing, and our little three year old is figuring it out too.
But, I'm not teaching him.
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Defining Family
We hear people talk about "family values", especially as the election year gets into full gear. We see advertisements from organizations like "Focus on the Family", and we hear extreme conservatives warn that the liberals are destroying the "family".
But, how do you define family?
From an academic perspective, we can start with one proposed by Fitzpatrick and Badzinski, "...small, kinship structured group whose primary function is the nurturing socialization of newborn children." (p.4) I personally like this definition. I was alone as an adult until I met my husband and together through marriage we became one union and when our union brought forth child, we were family. This family includes aunts, uncles, grandparents and any other relatives who take part in the lives of my children. I'm satisfied with this definition, but it is incomplete.
Winston Dictionary for Schools, 1967 offers seven possibilities:
1) a group of closely related people, as parents and their children
2) the children alone of such a group
3) a household; a group of persons under one roof
4) a body of persons descended from a common ancestor; tribe; clan
5) distinguished lineage; as they are people of good family
6) a group of things with some common characteristics as a mineral family
7) in biology, a classification of plants or animals larger than a genus, but smaller than an order; as the cat family
All of these are accurate, but still incomplete.
In our own language, we put restrictions on the term, as in when we speak of someone near and dear, but not related by blood or marriage and we say, "He is like family"
At the same time, we broaden the scope of the term when we use it to describe groups such as our "church family".
The text authors broaden the term even further and state, "As we talk about families, we will take a broad, inclusive view. Therefore, if the members consider themselves to be a family, and function as a family, we accept their self-definition." (Family Communication, p.8)
So, basically, from an academic perspective, there is no such thing as a definition of the word 'family'. It is a subjective term.
RELATED POSTS:
For info on the family that I chose to analyze for this class, see My Family
For my Communication Theory and event analysis, see Systems Theory & My Family
But, how do you define family?
From an academic perspective, we can start with one proposed by Fitzpatrick and Badzinski, "...small, kinship structured group whose primary function is the nurturing socialization of newborn children." (p.4) I personally like this definition. I was alone as an adult until I met my husband and together through marriage we became one union and when our union brought forth child, we were family. This family includes aunts, uncles, grandparents and any other relatives who take part in the lives of my children. I'm satisfied with this definition, but it is incomplete.
Winston Dictionary for Schools, 1967 offers seven possibilities:
1) a group of closely related people, as parents and their children
2) the children alone of such a group
3) a household; a group of persons under one roof
4) a body of persons descended from a common ancestor; tribe; clan
5) distinguished lineage; as they are people of good family
6) a group of things with some common characteristics as a mineral family
7) in biology, a classification of plants or animals larger than a genus, but smaller than an order; as the cat family
All of these are accurate, but still incomplete.
In our own language, we put restrictions on the term, as in when we speak of someone near and dear, but not related by blood or marriage and we say, "He is like family"
At the same time, we broaden the scope of the term when we use it to describe groups such as our "church family".
The text authors broaden the term even further and state, "As we talk about families, we will take a broad, inclusive view. Therefore, if the members consider themselves to be a family, and function as a family, we accept their self-definition." (Family Communication, p.8)
So, basically, from an academic perspective, there is no such thing as a definition of the word 'family'. It is a subjective term.
RELATED POSTS:
For info on the family that I chose to analyze for this class, see My Family
For my Communication Theory and event analysis, see Systems Theory & My Family
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