Don't Be a Boring Parent

Good morning! I get up every - well, nearly every - morning before everyone else in my house. I make coffee, I pray, I read, I write a bit on a novel I've got in a box, I make lists, I plan meals, I check my email, I post a Facebook status, etc. Pretty much, I do whatever I feel like doing in my pajamas.

Now, I could do all of those things anytime. The difference in the morning is that no one tries to talk to me when I'm doing them. In my house, early mornings are fairly quiet.
In fact, I have one early riser who I've trained to stay in bed and read until breakfast, so it stays quiet even longer.

Wonderful things happen in these morning hours. I often find inspiration and comfort. Today, I read this lovely article from a blog I follow.

It reminded me of some other things I've read about parenting. We all want to feel successful in some area of our lives. The experience of success is what builds self-esteem, and gives us the confidence to try again.
This is true for our children to.

It is important to look for and help them to discover areas where they can be successful. My young children love to help with household chores, like folding laundry and setting the table because they hear "Great job" For older kids, it could be a sport, a musical instrument, writing poetry, academics, or something else.
But, whatever it is, children entering their teen years having a place where they fit in; the team, the band, the writing club, the honor roll, etc. are less likely to get into trouble because they aren't struggling to find something to do and somewhere to belong.

This carries into adulthood too. I am happier when I make time to pursue hobbies (see list above). I've known women who send their children off to school and when the house is clean, they find themselves bored. Some turn to drinking, or gambling, or soap operas; and some even find a whole new life on the internet. The same troubles await our teens who have nothing productive to do.

I homeschool and have six children, so go ahead and ask, how could I possibly ever be bored?

I have a lot to do, but I sometimes find I'm bored on the sixth pan of dishes or the eighteenth basket of laundry, or the tenth time explaining how to divide fractions; but results are a little bit harder to see in homeschooling - no report cards - so, it comes back to the concept of failure. It is easy to feel like a failure as a parent every time one of my children struggles with a subject. EASY!
My hobbies allow me to see immediate success, (beautiful photographs, eloquent writing, money saved) and builds my confidence overall, which allows me to dig back in and get the job done; even when we are all bored with fractions.

So, here's my advice:
1) Help your children (and yourself) find areas where they/you can be successful
2) Pay attention to those successes
3) Be aware when they/you are struggling and feeling like a failure
4) Point out past successes, to help build future confidence

Remember when you got up out of bed and made breakfast even though you hadn't slept all night because of the two year old laying on your head, and your back hurt because of the four year old's knees pressing your spine into an abnormal position, and you were so stiff you could hardly walk? If you could do that, then you can do this.